Monday, September 22, 2008

The reason I stopped caring about Macross F(uck)

It's called Bt'X a manly show about dudes who fight cyborgs and evil androids with robotic animals who run on blood. It's superior to macross f(uck) in every way and the main characters don't suck. It's the reason I love anime, that and older women who can kick ass.

what's more appealing?

Young man ready to kill some cyborgs?

Or this?

Thought so bitch, and DJD, you know what's better than Ikari Warriors?


Rambo can't brag he punched a robot in the face and lived to tell the tale.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Macross Frontier; why it’s balls.(and why I am sucking those balls as I write this).

It’s been called macross F, and you know what that “F” stands for?
This is what I was saying repeatedly in my head as I was watching this.
Do you know why?
Keep reading to find out more!
Ok, so I tried to rewatch the first episode of Macross F(uck) cause I thought “hey you know the mecha crowd seems to like it” (they also like geass and 00, which is also balls, maybe I don’t know). It’s actually not that bad of a show, it’s actually watchable, if they remove one thing.
I mean, she is a chick right, with her pretty long hair…oh wait, I’m being told, oh the fuck? She’s not a woman? She’s a dude? Oh my god, but he’s so pretty! Damn you Kawamori and your borderline faggotry! It seems kinda pointless to have him as the main character, cause he feels more like a gimmick rather than a character. To appeal to the female fan base, they have the main character as some flying pretty boy (emphasis on pretty). The part that gets me though is when his faggy ass friend calls him “princess” and he gets annoyed. I’m thinking “if you don’t want you ass buddy to call you that, don’t dress like a chick you fag, cut the dew and look like you hold some balls and a penis in your crotch”. I know they only do it twice, but I wouldn’t be surprised if this is some sort of awful running gag Kawamori or who ever directs this would pull cause they hate people like me. Now, I wanna like this, and it’s not super awful but it is just really really fruity. Like holy shit man when watching it I could smell mangoes, berries and oranges and strawberries form my laptop as I watched this. That’s how fruity it is. But you ask “well Senior fantastico del fuego, lord and saviour Charleston, what does keep you from watching?”
Ranka, fucking, Lee and Sheryl Norme (The Galactic Fairy slut)
I’m a pathetic loser, go kill me now please, as it seems I found a female anime character that is not (so far) just a gimmick to pull in creepy otaklue, but an honest to god fleshed out character I can actually like. She doesn’t sound like a five yr old girl and she’s not a cardboard cut out to project my masturbatory desires to (ngggfffhhhhh oh ranka lee you look like a ten yr old girl with your awesome loli body, let me wank nggfffffffhhh to you LOLZ). If I was a true loser and hated myself (which is evident since I’m pretty masochistic) I would say I am moe for Ranka Lee, but not in a creepy pedo way, but in a, as the people who stole this manly word put it, in a fashion to that of a friend. Here’s the reason why, she’s fleshed out and she’s quirky and a young dreamer, I can, surprisingly root for her. She also works in a Chinese restaurant and I fucking love Chinese food.
Sheryl, on the other hand seems kinda like an American pop idol, rather than the Japanese one. But she does seem strong and also fully fleshed out.
Now for the combat HOLY FUCK I was holy shit balls wanktacularly impressed, I mean dogfights combined with mech fighting, I fucking enjoyed it. I was satisfied and was happy. Also the Valkryies are kinda cool too, I guess. You know, not manly and gritty but hey, what the fuck.
My final verdict? Holy fuck?! I'm gonna watch episode two? Yeah, I enjoyed it, and I wanna see more of Sheryl and Ranka, I wanna see what happens to them because they interest me. The male characters are surprisingly boring but the female characters are highly developed and very very fleshed out (wink wink LOLZ, just kidding they really do interest me). Alto can still fuck off though, even though he pulled of a bad ass.

Yeah, I know, I’m fucking surprised too.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Ultramen, the modern Christ myth

They sacrifice themselves for the better being of the earth, throwing all their strength and love into a planet that isn’t even their own. Using their mighty powers to save us from monsters and maybe even ourselves. Men who, with their destructive strength use it with benevolent will.
I’ve been in an ultraman kick lately, since watching Ultraman moebius, and I’ve noticed something about these friendly red and silver skinned giant. They defend earth with all their strength, some even die just fighting one or two monsters (Taro and Zoffy*). All of them become human at one point and know what it is to be human. Now, looking from a purely logical or educational stand point, you can draw some small parallels between ultraman and Jesus. Now, I’m no bible loving fundamentalist, but I’m also not a god-hating atheist, I’m in the middle. But that’s not the point, I’m also not here to argue if Jesus existed or anything, I’m just drawing parallels and forming a conclusion.
One of the proof I have is the Ultra father or if you prefer Father of Ultra (god) sends down a solder of the space garrison (jesus). He becomes human, defends earth and if things become desperate, he’s willing to lose his life. Now I’ve heard from some sources that tsuburaya was a Christian (don’t quote me on this, ask August Ragone for this he’s the tsuburaya man) but maybe when Tsuburaya was making ultraman, the story of jesus may have been imprinted on him.
Or this could be seen as a modern Japanese interpretation of the Christ myth. I’ve personally always seen the story of Christ as something depressing and very dioscouraging to the point of thinking “god humanity is a dick”. But not in Ultraman, like Jesus, Ultraman performed “miracles” which was not seen as a threat by some but as a true blessing, and instead of being prosecuted, he is beloved, and even integrated into society. I like to think of it as a Christ story gone well, where instead of Jesus dying on the cross, everyone took his message to heart, and even those who wanted to destroy him are convinced by his utter kindness. There is also the fact that Ultraman are “men of light”. The planet they come from is a nebula of light, M78, which could be seen as heaven, and the ultramen are almost like angels. This act of interga;lactic sacrifice and kindness is also not limited to the earth but to various galaxies and planets. If you think about it, a primitive planet who is protetcted regularly by an ultraman may see him as a god.
I know you don’t end a sentence like this, but I’m lazy and so in the end, I think Ultraman’s deeper level is that it’s the story of benevolent beings who love us, and in this day and age, I think we need some ultramen on the way were headed. But their’s always hope if there is ultramen. Kind of like how some people think Jesus loves them, I like to think if monsters attack ultraman will come and be our friend.