Monday, August 24, 2009
I'm not the happiest guy right now, due to the fact that I fail at love (see previous post) school and my parents. I know I said failure is just a step back and I shouldn't be lazy, but man it looks so good right now from where I'm standing, just giving up and becoming like my old man. Sure it looks good right now, but when I'm his age I'll be a failure like him. But I feel really pathetic guess all I have to do is just keep on going. Oh and Inglorious Basterds is the best fucking film Tarantino has fucking made. Fucking watch it.
Being a man means you're gonna be attracted to a girl, and sure that's all peaches and cream, but try being attracted to a girl who's got a boyfriend. And to add salt to the wounds she's practially the perfect woman of your dreams. Oh and just to make things worse, you haven't enrolled in your courses and int a few weeks the school year's going to start. Does that sound like a bad romantic comedy? if it does, then I'm sorry because that's the way my life is going on right now. it's times like these that a man just has to to either back down, or keep trying. But no one ever said I can't walk in between, but the thing that pisses me off the most is that I'm attracted to this girl and that I've basically become her friend. It hurts to see her with someone else, and that I can't have her. but if I tried it would just ruin everything. I think it's because my track record with women really suck.; I've been truly attracted to four women so far, one was a stuck up bitch who i had to befriend a fucking fat ass for, one I never saw again, one lives in another province and then this one (she also happens to be my coworker). I wish I wasn't attracted to girls, I don't wanna be gay, I just don't want to feel anymore. Feeling things hurt, but I guess it's part of evolving and becoming a person, but why does it hurt?